Parenting in Wants or Needs

A very good and meaning article piece from 1 of my mentors, Ken Chee

I over heard these conversations while walking behind 2 parents who were telling their kids,

"I have no money to buy these for you. Money don't drop from the sky"

And they carry on when they saw their young daughters kept quiet with a disappointed look, "Do you have money? If no, then walk away"

I have no business in other family affair and I'm also not an early childhood education expert.

However, I can share with you how I will converse differently to my muses soon regarding financial matters,

"Papa and mama have money. And we choose not to buy this item for you unless you can share why you need it".

This come from the space of abundance and choice rather than scarcity and limitation.

And if they can prove that it is a need and not want, I would want them to sleep over this idea for at least 7 days. This allow them to practice delay instant gratification. And after 7 days, if they still need it, then we might take action. The days of delay will get longer when they grow older.

If it is a want, the conversation will goes like this,

"Great that you have something you fancy. However, papa and mama money is not your money. Hence, if you want to get something, you need money. And in order for you to have money, you must exchange something of similar value legally, morally and ethically to get it. How about helping papa to wash the car for a month?"

Get them to work for their want since young. This foster self reliance and come from a space of creation rather than dependence and limitation mindset.

Most importantly, the root source come from parents, care givers and educators. Most people condition their children with bad financial beliefs without even realizing it. For example, "Money is the root of all evil", "We don't have enough, so stop asking", "Be grateful if you have food on the table, African children are dying of hunger" etc. Or the other extreme is buying tons of toys and saying 'Yes' to all their children whims and fancy, thus creating a raspberry generation who expect 'entitlement' with shallow values in life. I have little respect for young people like them.

And this form a vicious cycle because they will keep doing the same thing (learnt from their unaware parents, care givers and educators) to their children and their children to their children until one generation decided to educate themselves voluntarily (not from school but learn from people who are successful financially) because of financial struggle or a major personal crisis such as bankruptcy.

How are you teaching your children? Are you setting a good role model for them?

You can start here at www.valueinvestingsummit.com

Share if you like it.

P/S: By the way, don't expect your children to take care of you and your spouse during your winter years because most of them (with the same old mindset about money) can't even take care of themselves and their own families financially due to raising cost of living and inflation!